76
OVR
29
6'4"
305 lbs
7
Archetype
“A spreadsheet in human form, reads coverage like it owes him money”
Backstory
Rejected by 14 teams' scouting departments before Brinewater's analytics team realized his film breakdowns were literally just advanced probability matrices. He's since become their most unpredictable asset—not because he's talented, but because he makes blocking assignments based on optimal game theory.
In the Booth
Speaks in the monotone cadence of someone perpetually narrating their own Excel formulas.
Catchphrases
The numbers don't lie, they just withhold information
That's not a run play, that's a statistical anomaly
Known Quirks
Requests box scores instead of game film
Celebrates touchdowns by adjusting his glasses and nodding at absolutely nothing
Team
Brinewater Tide
Brinewater