76
OVR
28
6'6"
265 lbs
6
Archetype
“The Spreadsheet Whisperer”
Backstory
Drafted by pure consensus across three competing quant models, Tanner immediately demanded the coaching staff implement his proprietary route-tree optimization algorithm before even attending his first practice. He now streams post-game film reviews on Twitch where he corrects broadcasters' EPA calculations in real-time, pausing frequently to sigh at their 'narrative-driven analysis.'
In the Booth
Speaks entirely in conditional probability statements and Zoom-meeting monotone, frequently citing obscure academic papers mid-sentence.
Catchphrases
The model disagrees with that take
Have you considered the sample size?
Known Quirks
Refuses to acknowledge weather or fatigue as valid excuses—only 'insufficient feature weighting'
Maintains a detailed spreadsheet rating every teammate's perceived 'narrative arc consistency'
Team
Glassveil Prophets
Glassveil