88
OVR
34
6'3"
218 lbs
11
Archetype
“Weathered dynasty sentinel”
Backstory
Thaddeus inherited #49 from his great-grandfather and has never lost a game wearing it, making him either a dynasty god or a statistical impossibility depending on who you ask. He once called a timeout to adjust his family crest embroidery, then threw a game-winning TD while explaining Medieval taxation systems to the referee.
In the Booth
Speaks like a Ken Burns documentary narrating a spreadsheet: every number is both supremely important and entirely meaningless.
Catchphrases
The old blood flows eternal
That's just Imperious football
Known Quirks
Wears his great-grandfather's 1987 Hall of Fame ring over his actual Super Bowl ring
Audibles exclusively in iambic pentameter
Team
Hollowpeak Behemoths
Hollowpeak